Making excuses is a plague in today’s world. You are losing opportunities and making your life miserable. What can you do to stop excuses?
Many people know that excuses are a bad thing but they deny this behaviour concerning themselves. This article will help you understand the challenge of excuses better and take necessary action to stop them.
Today you will learn how to stop excuses, and what the most common types of them you can meet in everyday life. You will also discover two tools that can be used instantly to combat excuses.
I will also show you how to disarm excuses. Are you ready to take the challenge and start a new, better life? Keep reading then.
What Are Excuses
In the shortest, they represent the reasons for not taking action or taking a different action when you face a challenge while pursuing your goals/implementing your resolutions.
Test Yourself
Let’s do an exercise. Before scrolling down, read the statement below and notice your first reaction. What would you say/do when facing these challenges – how would you reason your decision? Write the answers down.
• You are living with an abusive boyfriend/parents and know that this relationship has a negative impact on your health. Will you move on and why? Why not?
• Your friend hurt you and you need to tell him that in an assertive way. Will you do that? Why? Why not?
• You are supposed to clean your house and procrastinate about it for a month. Will you take action in an hour’s time?
• You are supposed to visit your grandmother. Will do do the good deed soon? Why? Why not?
• Your job is low-paid and you make ends meet, will you change it shortly? Why yes? Why no?
• You consider starting a business. Will you commit to your decision or procrastinate? Why?
• You should go to the dentist/doctor for a checkup. Will you make an appointment now? Why yes? Why no?
Are Your Excuses a Dogma?
Now look at your answers. In any case, if you are not motivated enough and answer ‘no’, something can justify your decision. These are your excuses. Read about the nine most common ones. The tenth is your unique excuse. Learn if your excuses are dogmas indeed.
1. I have no time
It simply means that a given person, task, habit or goal has no importance for you. Otherwise, you would find time to meet someone or make some effort. Evidence? Check what you can do to save your life.
Moreover, time is recognised on the Earth, in the third dimension. We are living in the present and the past or the future are illusions. We project the past, which is gone, to the future, which is unknown. Only the present moment can be used for creation and shaping your future life.
Of course, you might not have time right now, being busy. The question is ‘why?’ Can you be more flexible then?
2. I am too old/young…
Age is a mark created by the system to control you. We usually focus on the age written on your ID. But your body can actually be older or younger according to your biological clock.
Moreover, all beliefs concerning age are based on social engineering used by the system, forcing you to behave in a given way. And age is another aspect of time. Think of the people who were living before the Flood: were they scared about their age at 40 or even 100?
Also, ask yourself what ‘old’ or ‘young means to you and think. Maybe it is rather a matter of experience and capabilities, independence than the number of years? Look at many ‘young’ people being very mature and ‘old’ ones still unable to manage their emotions or make independent decisions.
3. I have no money…
This excuse is instilled by the system, based on money and the idea of ownership. However, there are dimensions where there is no ownership, everything is common and people exchange their assets with each other.
Moreover, we obviously know that it is your mind and perseverance that decide how much money you will attract. If you have too little money, start by changing your mindset and take some action. Also, you can attract more money by using the Law of Resonance and the Law of Assumption.
4. It’s too difficult…
Difficulty is a relative and subjective term. It may be too hard now. However, polishing the right skills and networking makes any task a piece of cake. if you cannot do something, change your mindset and master the skills necessary to complete the task and ask someone else for help.
5. I don’t have the skills to do it…
This excuse is very easy to abolish. Just do something to learn the skills. I know it is usually combined with no money, no time, no network, inappropriate age… The time has come to grow up and act. Start from your mindset. Everything is achievable if you believe in it and are willing to take some action.
6. I don’t have the foggiest idea about…
Ask, ask, and once again ask someone else to help you. I know that sometimes we feel too proud to ask for help or there is no one around. Again, use the power of your subconscious mind to attract what you want.
7. People will ridicule me…
Low self-esteem is a challenge. But it was programmed by the system which promotes some kinds of thinking and behaviour while others are punished. But you are perfect and enough as the child of the Universe.
When you were born, no one questioned your worth. it was installed later into your mind. Decode the script and start seeing yourself as a wonder.
8. I will be ostracized because…
The fear of abandonment is a natural fear existing during times of total dependency on your caregivers. Care equaled survival then. We are also programmed to think that only living in a group will give us survival.
Of course, a group is stronger than a loner wolf but the power of his/her mind will be always stronger than the collective mind.
Also, there are 8 billion people on the globe and we have the Internet. So if you are excluded from one community, there are other ones somewhere else. For example, finding a different religious community.
9. I will lose my money/house/job
The fear of failure and loss is very strong because we associate it with the danger to our survival. Moreover, we are taught to treat failures as a catastrophe, being afraid of judgment, exclusion and destruction by others.
But what and who is lost? The part of your ego, not your Essence. Living many times in the Universe and on the Earth, you know, as the Soul, that nothing is a loss, everything is just an experience. Plus, everything is only a stage of something greater.
Losing your job can endanger your survival but not an eternal journey, This loss may be significant now but what about a month, ten years?
10. I … (add anything that justifies your procrastination)
You can list a hundred other excuses here, not mentioned above, based on your fears, beliefs and experiences from the past, not only in this life.
For example, you can argue that you will be hurt, killed, and abused in the same way as in the past. Read once again the reasoning for abolishing the previous excuse and think if your unique excuse is still true. All these excuses can be choked by changing your mindset and taking action.
Why Don’t You Stop Excuses?
The truth is brutal. You can make a temporary profit by avoiding pain and/or making it less unbearable. However, the long-term consequences are negative. Read why:
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- Lost opportunities that will not come back
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- Regret that you have missed the boat again (and forever)
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- Lost time that will never be available again
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- Frustration because you are not making progress
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- Guilt that you have failed with something/lest someone down
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- Being angry at yourself
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- Further procrastination
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- Criticism/Ridicule from other people
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- Self-hared
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- Lost resources (money, connections, assets)
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- Being killed
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- Ruining your health and fitness
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- Being dependent on others
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- Stress, e.g. because of abuse
This is not the total price you will pay for making excuses. You also create negative karma by avoiding doing the homework assigned to you by your soul. This means that in the next life, you will have more to work on.
How to Stop Excuses in a Smart Way
Once you know that the price paid for making excuses is high, let’s take action and stop them. What can you do?
1. List Your Ten Most Frequent Excuses
This job has already been done. The most common excuses were listed above in this article. However, I encourage you to look at your goals now and go through any reasons why you are discouraged to make an effort and go the extra mile.
Why do you want to cut corners and be slothful? Brainstorm and write down your excuses.
2. Find the Reason for These Excuses
I have also listed them above. Your excuses will be mostly based on fears and insecurities because of past traumatic experiences and the driving force of survival. Here are more details:
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- Fears of rejection, abandonment, ridicule, abuse, criticism, disability, vulnerability, intimacy, illness, death, failure, success, poverty, loss, loneliness, being hurt, especially emotionally. This is not the whole list. Add the fear not listed here.
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- Past wounds of your inner child that may be triggered by taking a given action. These are your experiences, like being sexually abused at home as a child or mobbed at work later.
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- You want to avoid pain, discomfort and death.
3. Stop Excuses by Disarming Them
Now the time has come to take action. I will present you with some effective tools, tried by me and many of the people I have helped so far. We will be talking about snippets, self-talk and questions.
Use Snippets to Stop Excuses
They are short statements which you can say when an excuse emerges. Use them when the excuses are strong, as an emergency tool. It is a brutal method. No discussion with the excuses is allowed, you just eliminate them. You can tell your mind:
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- No buts!
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- No excuses!
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- Stop it!
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- Stop excuses!
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- I’m responsible!
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- I’m in charge!
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- I can do it!
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- I will handle it!
You can also tell your mind:
Practise Using Snippets and Positive Self-Talkn nExcuses are triggered on autopilot so you need to train your brain to use snippets in the same way. Start with choosing the snippet from the list above and learning it by heart. Then write down the message sent to your mind.
Apart from the one quoted above, you can also modify the message to your mind, adding a different snippet than the one I have chosen. For example:
Then think of one of your challenges, the thing which you procrastinate about. Write it down again and add one automatic excuse you would use to justify your procrastination.
The next step is to practise using snippets and messages sent to your mind. Practise in front of the mirror, thinking of any excuses that come to your mind. Then use the snippets and messages in the real world.
Take the Challenge
For the next month, when you avoid taking action and generate excuses, use the snippet. You can also wear a rubber band on your wrist for the first week and pull it whenever you start making excuses.
After 30 days check your progress and continue creating a new habit for the next 60 days, monitoring your progress on an app such as Habit Bull, an application for Android.
Stop Excuses by Questioning
Sometimes snippets may not be enough to eradicate excuses due to the underlying reasons hidden in each excuse. The fear of pain, extinction and destruction can be paralysing. Then you need to address these fears as well.
Nevertheless, here are some probing questions that can be used in the case of the most common excuses. Select one excuse of each kind and answer the relevant questions in writing:
Stop Excuses of “I’m too old/ young”
• What’s the evidence that you are too old/young?
• How true is that?
• What’s the real problem with being old/young? How can you solve it?
• How can you use your age to your advantage?
• Have you ever tried this thing before successfully?
• What does “too old/young” mean to you?
Stop Excuses of “I have no money”
• Have you ever tried to make it?
• What does “not enough money” mean?
• How true is that excuse?
• What can you do to make more money?
• What resources could you use to earn money?
• Who could help you to earn the money you need?
Stop Excuses of “I have no time”
• How can you be more productive?
What would happen if you had time?
• How could you manage your time to take action and do the thing?
• Are you sure that time is the real problem? If not, what is it?
• What are you waiting for?
Stop Excuses of “I have no team/helpers”
• How true is it?
• What can you do to find helpers?
• What is the real challenge here and how can you overcome it?
• Who has already helped you and how could you ask them to do that again?
• What can you do right now to find the first person for your dream?
Stop excuses of “I’m afraid of failure”
• What does “failure” mean?
• How probable is the failure?
• Have you ever succeeded in a similar venture? If yes, how can you do it again?
• Has anyone succeeded in the field you’re taking the challenge?
• What is the worst-case scenario? How can you handle it?
• Why are you afraid of taking action? What can you do to overcome this fear?
Stop Excuses of “I’m not good/experienced/smart enough”
• What does “not good enough” mean?
• What can you do right now to improve your skills
• When was the last time you succeeded in this field?
• What is the evidence that you are “not good enough”?
• What are you waiting for?n
Practise
Read the answers aloud in front of the mirror., regularly for at least 30 consecutive days to still new beliefs and stop excuses. If there is still a victim voice in them, dig deeper answering what you are not willing to act and how you could overcome the obstacle.
In a Nutshell
To stop excuses, you need to overcome a challenge. However, once you are aware of what triggers your reluctance to take action, it is easier to succeed. Try disarming questions and create a habit of using snippets. Good luck. With lots of love and light,
Vicky Yang
